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Revelation!!!

Actually its not a revelation or anything, I just realized it recently. I always had this confusion and doubt as to this one question. It kept nagging me from the back of my head. Why do women change their ideas, perspectives or goals after marriage? A spec of the moment changes these people-  from a career oriented person to the best house wife (oh, sorry lemme sugarcoat it, home maker), or from a cheery bubbly girl into the silent versions, etc. They reevaluate their entire perspectives, and they present it to you as though they were for that side -from forever, Dude, You just shifted sides yesterday? What is happening?  Different answers swirled through my head at different points in time. The answers - fell in love, love for children, responsibilities, and the list goes on. I saw this happen with my friends, aunts, neighbors, even stories I heard about my own mother bore witness to this fact. How does things change so much? It's not that I thought it was wrong, its just that I could never understand the depth of change that happening to that one person. As a child I thought maybe there will be a psychological transformation of some sort that this cheerful girl suddenly changed into this all grown women the moment the gold chain touches her skin.

So, back to the point, so I got the answer to the question. Its not the love for any freaking thing, not the child and definitely not the guy, its not that your career was lost because your employer knew you would be pregnant in just 10 months, its not because all your education skill just vanished. My finding------ ten-tadan----- EXPECTATIONS. Its because your husband who made tea till the day before the wedding by himself started expecting it from you. Its because your family started expecting you to be matured (beta, now you are married....). Its because your siblings sit and contemplate what changes came about in you(oh that is because throughout their life that is what they have heard about marriage). Its because some random relatives or people you rarely see starts counting days for you to pop out babies (oh this list is not that small, my grandmother for instance, till my marriage it was - I wanna see you happily married before I die, and now - I wanna see your child before I die). Yeah people just tend to think you are a baby popping machine. So where did I leave off? Oh yeah the because... Its also because of those poor innocent and anticipating friends who think marriage is all bloom bloom. Its because of all those people who come and say the major purpose of women is to run a family and take care of all the needs. And the list just goes on and on...,

Its the expectations that change people or the girls in this specific instance. Oh don't think I am unhappy in life, its just that I have always tried to figure it out in my head before acting, that I am completely confused. I am in the stage of figuring out whether I should be walking with the crowd of sheep pushed with just the wave of sticks or just be adamant and let the stick be used on me.  Anyway born a women I know where my fate lies. 

Comments

  1. Unknown24 May 2017 at 23:21

    Dude.. Why do u have to run behind others expectations!Be all that you want to be, why are you being stuck in the time bound stance?! It's we who keep on writing about these craps and make everybody think about it again and again and the so called creepy society think Women are baby popping machines!!!
    ~H@N

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  2. Unknown10 June 2017 at 02:36

    Haha, really nice perspective. but I think writing about this won't aggravate it. Its my way of answering because most of the time I can't say it on their face, and also many at times when people intrude into privacy they actually don't realize it because it has happened with them and everyone thinks that the normal. In the post, I refer an incident to my grandmother, well its not her that I am angry at, its a lot of other people whom I cant refer because that would create one hell of a havoc. If and ever, those people I intend this come across these, I want them to know, that I wasn't actually okay with it, that it was just my so called Maryada that I kept quite.

    And Haniya, I was never someone I did not want to be, and whenever someone thought that I was what I want them to be, I can say that, the society made me learn things like acting and faking, because these are the things that lets things be normal (again, I am just faking it), I never wanted anything to be normal, I want extra ordinary and abnormal.

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